My daughter is 19 years old. She is labeled, has been labeled with the school system for 14 years as mildly mentally retarded. If they wanted to get even more school funding, they would ask auditory questions (she is a very visual learner). They could get her LABELED as moderate mentally retarded!!

She had a cleft of the soft palate which had to be repaired at 18 months and bone dysplasia. At 2 1/2 weeks old, we were told to go home and love her. She would never be normal, a slow learner. We were scared to death thinking doctors were "gods" doing everything they told us to do. For the first 3 years, she was on antibiotics all the time (which I believe was a contributing factor). She was diagnosed as failure to thrive. She crawled at 6 months, walked at 12 months, but what the doctors "talked into existence" happened. She fell quickly behind when it came to learning. Obviously, they brought no hope, only what we should look for, so we looked for all the BAD signs and they were all there. I can tell story after story about medical screw ups. At 4-5 years old, we were driving a Toyota. She came in the house, drew this thing (a car) and wrote the word Toyota. That word at that age, should have never been!!! Toyota was the HOPE I carried all these years that she could learn.

When we started school in the handicapped room, THESE kids were not allowed to eat with the regular kids. She had a great special ed teacher, Patrice Kruger Kelley. However, all Erin feed off was the other kids with disabilities and their strange actions. If that is all you are around, that becomes normal. Kids do as their peers do. I fought to get her in regular classrooms. Finally in 4th grade she got in spelling. I knew she could spell. They told me she had to get 80% or better or she would have to go back to the special ed room. She got 90, 95, 100, 102's (extra credit words) until the Friday after the school Christmas program. She always required much sleep and she didn't get tobed until 10:00. She got a 69 in spelling. The following Monday I got a note she couldn't be in the class anymore. I went into the teacher and asked to see her book. (They wouldn't show it to me.) If anyone else got below an 80 they would have to go to the special ed room also. Needless to say, my child stayed. (Never again did she get below an 85) ***By this time, I got a label to which I proudly wear yet today.

I wanted her to go to social studies and science. Don Gronemeyer, the principal, wrote a note "If you want her to have social studies and science, here's the book teach her yourself." (I would take out his name from my story IF he apologized.) She never got science until 5th grade second semester except what I read, and NEVER, EVER got any history or social studies Let me tell you how she got into science. I went to the superintendent and said "My son hates history. He gets F's in history. Kids are starting to make fun of him and now it is starting to effect all the other classes. I hated history and got D's and F's and I live just fine without knowing history. Can my son get out of history?? He could do something else that period." After getting "No, he must take history" for the third time, I said "Then you tell me why my daughter can't have history and science." What could the guy say, he was dooped. He just told me there was no way my "son" could get out. I still laugh about that one. He must have been the only one in the district that didn't know my name.

My greatest story about history was in Stanton on July 4th. We were at a craft show and a guy asked kids "Why do we celebrate the 4th of July?" Two "regular" kids could not answer, but Erin knew the answer!!! I was thrilled!! Middle school was excellent. I would not allow her in the special ed room AT ALL. She was in the resource room with regular kids that had learning problems. She actually had a science teacher who called me (that usually meant trouble) and said "All my kids join in for hands on things and Erin won't. What should I do to get her involved??" Tears swelled up I couldn't hardly continue the conversation. Here was a teacher that wanted Erin involved!!! I'd ask every IEP, when is this going to change. It never did!!

Guess what else? A normal kid in the class befriended her and they do all kinds of things together, still!!! (SueAnne and her go to Walmart, out to eat, to the show, and mom doesn't have to walk her in. She calls her on the phone all the time!! It is so wonderful!!!)

She had excellent math and reading teachers. One writes e-mail to her to this day.EXCEL--you wouldn't believe. Again--ALL documented by the school. The phycologist has to do evaluations every three years. My luck, it was exiting 5th grade, then 3 years at middle school at 8th grade exit.  Mr Goos said he couldn't believe the change. Most "labeled" kids go waaaay behind by 8th grade. They are tested against "normal" 8th graders. Erin gained points!!! Praise God!! I have only a high school education. He has all this college education and couldn't figure out why!! Daaah! Put her where she is challenged and she will step up. (I do like Mike Goos, but these poor teachers and special ed pros think what they were taught in college is the only way. The bad thing is, when you bring up new things and it isn't their idea--they are mad and won't do it. They usually find every way to tell you it won't work instead of the possibility that it will work.)

After three great years, Erin was ready for high school. Kim Korth, special ed teacher in high school, knew me only from Lost Creek school days. BAD NEWS!! At the high school, they didn't have resource rooms so we had no option but to put Erin in her room. The third week of school Erin came home and looked at my husband and said "You are nothing but a drug dealer". Got our attention!! I asked her to repeat what she said. Again "You are nothing but a drug dealer". I asked where in the world did she get that.  She said "Kim Korth said so because you sell cigarettes". He is a salesman for Hadley Braitwait and he does sell cigarettes. However, we have always referred to him as the candy man because he used to always have samples of candy in the trunk of his car. I don't think Erin knew he sold cigarettes.  Needless to say, what I taught her over the summer she actually LOST going to her classroom. They couldn't call for the use of the handibus one time all year long so Erin would learn how to do that, but they did find time to teach sex education for three weeks.

The kids all managed to learn about her gambling habits, going to casinos. She said "That is the real world and the kids should know it". First, where are they going to get the money--from their welfare checks?? That's a great use of tax payers dollars!! On January 31, 1998, I was doing my lesson for a Bible study. We had a really BAD day. I wrote in the book, "Ask the girls if I should give up on Erin and just accept her or if I should keep searching." I believed you could love the child but hate the condition. I always prayed for a miracle and that didn't come. But I NEVER gave up hope!!

All the answers are supposed to be in the Bible, so I started looking. I was lead to Psalms 40 in the New Century Version Bible. It is a student Bible easy for Erin to understand (mom too) and the writing is only in this version. It says "I waited patiently for the Lord. (actually I think it was the other way around) He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out the pit of destruction, out of the sticky mud. (I think I may have been in jail for murdering a principal and sp ed teacher otherwise) He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many people will see this and worship him. They will TRUST the Lord. vs5 Lord my God, you have done many miracles. Your plans for US are many. If I tried to tell them all, there would be too many to count. {This next verse is the one that got my attention and I KNEW it was for us} vs6 You do no want sacrifices and offerings. But you made a "hole in my ear"to show that my body and life are yours. ( See, Erin had a permanent hole in her ear that only could be corrected by surgery. We did not have the surgery because she gets so sick and doctors would not listen to me about how sick she always got after surgery) vs 9 & 10 I will tell about your goodness in the great meeting of your people.  (Erin could not talk about anything that would make sense to A GREAT MEETING! She gets her words all mixed up and gives up) Lord, you do know my lips are not silent. I do not hide your goodness in my heart. I SPEAK about your loyalty and salvation. I do not hide your love and truth from the people in the great meeting.

I told the girls at Bible study the next day and said "I don't know what is going to happen,but something will happen" I knew this had to come ONLY from the Lord. One gal immediately said "You know that this my not happen in your life time but God will make Erin whole in heaven". When she left two others said "Don't believe what she said. Stand on your belief because satan will try every way to take it away from you." They told me not to say anything to people because they may try to steal this HOPE. (I don't think the gal wanted to steal HOPE, she didn't want me to get my HOPE high and be disappointed)

Three Sundays later, Ron Clarke was teaching Sunday School and asked "Has anyone ever stood on a verse and it has come true". I spoke up and said "I am right now and believing God for a miracle" All of them knew Erin. I cried through the whole thing and I said "I believe something will happen". The following Friday, my friend Rose Edic who knew I was so upset with school and homeschooling went to Shelley Noonan's (a lady in Humphrey who homeschools and buys and sells used books). She asked if she had something that I could teach Erin. Shelley said she didn't but someone gave her this set of tapes on child development and maybe they would help. (I don't believe Shelly ever listened to the tapes) She never knew me but told Rose to give these tapes to me. The first tape got my attention. By the second tape, I could tell Erin was all screwed up but did not know what to do. These tapes talked about menal retardation wasn't a disease. It was a symptom of a disorganized brain. If you get the brain organized, the symptom will go away. Tey talked about putting a healthy arm on a tight-clenched fist of a cerebal palsy child, the healthy arm will do the same thing. It wasn't the arm, it was the disorganized brain. By the 4th tape, I called Utah. I said I wanted the soonest appointment. The most impatient person on earth had to wait until July 1st--three months.

On the 5th tape a guy asks "Are you saying that my mentally retarded son could be normal?" Dr Doman says "Yes, that is what I am saying". I shut the tape off and sobbed for nearly an hour!!! No one EVER said those words to me. Erin could be normal. I knew, that I knew, that I knew this was for us. This was the first time in my life "I knew" God was really working. Looking back to January 31, 1998, I believe "I" surrendered Erin to Him and He took over--and what a job He is doing!!!

Erin and I went to Dallas. The devil tried his best to keep me from going. My purse had been taken out of the car. That meant no drivers license. Layton wanted me to stay in town to get one, that would have made me late. Everyone knows that driver's license doesn't make you drive better. (Or does it--I didn't speed!!) In Dallas, we had to change interstates three times, once we had to exit to the left on a six lane highway. I was in position to exit right. All the way down I prayed for someone who had been helped who was soooo bad off.  Not just a little bad--really bad!! God put Lyn Waldick there. She adopted a son from Romania who could not walk, talk, see or hear. At 2 1/2 he weighed 15 lbs and was abused so badly he had cigarette burns all over his body and strangulation marks on his neck.

Dr Doman addressed Erin first, then me and took Erin in for testing. Then my turn. I looked at Bob and asked the very same question that man asked "Are you saying my daughter can be normal?" Without ANY hesitation he said "Yes that is what I am saying.  "I told myself I would not cry--thank God they have a supply of kleenex's.  Eighteen years of hundreds of doctors, teachers, and tutors and no one ever said those precious words.

What is even greater, I NEVER doubted!! I called Rose from Dallas crying my eyes outon those same interstates just telling her to pray me home!!! At 5PM  I called Layton cried all over again, he thought something was wrong!! I assured him I was fine, the car was in tact and I still hadn't gotten picked up.  Erin was tested at 3rd grade 1st month in math. Febr 17 (eight month evaluation) she was at 3gr 9month. Eight months in 8 months--Praise God!!! Not only that, she knew only +0's, +1's, up to 2+4 and all the doubles 8+8, 4+4. In 6 months she memorized all the math facts except 8+6 and 8+5. (We may never know them)

Fast forward to May 1st, she knows the subtraction facts. (with a few stragglers there also) In reading recognition, she went from 6th grade to 9th grade 7th month. In comprehension she went from 5th gr 8th month to 7th gr 5th month. One way they measure growth of the brain is by digits. She went from 4 and 5 digits to 5 and 6 digits.  In February she even did one 7, but for some reason fell back to 5's. She came back up to 6's and needed a surgery, fell way back again. But I know that persistence will get us through this.

I tell everyone I had Christmas every day in December. Once I was having terrible back spasms, flat on my back and Erin came to me. She said "I can't get the water in the washing machine." I asked "What are you doing?" She said "Washing clothes" I asked "Where did you get the clothes?" She now thinking I lost it said "Upstairs in the bathrooms." I leaped off the couch and went to the laundry room and asked if she put in soap, etc. She said "I wanted to know how to get the water in". Our machine you have to push in and turn, then pull out. All she didn't do is pull the knob out.  There were colors and whites all together, but I NEVER would have stopped that load! We could work on sorting later.

Another time I threatened her if her room wasn't clean she couldn't go to a dance. She went in, came out in about 20 minutes, threw a broken hanger away and went back in. She came out about 10 minutes later and said she was finished. A broken hanger alone would have been enough for her to give up and quit!! The thing is her brain was getting organized enough to follow through.

She never asked who, what, when, where, how questions. We are starting to get a few.   She never had energy beyond one level--that was always SLOW. No matter how hurried you were, she WENT SLOW!! The first time I noticed she ran to get something out of her desk, I called my mom and shouted Erin has another speed!!! She ran to get something. I don't know if the organization of her brain is letting her have more energy for other things instead of such a hard task of thinking through things. I don't know, but I love it.

She is putting things away. Like the cordless phone may be on the kitchen table. My husband leaves it and she puts it away. Now he has to go get it to use it again. If someone leaves pop cans or dishes down stairs, she brings them up. WOW!! We never saw this EVER before. We are just praising God for it. I am truly blessed because Erin is such a willing student. Weeks and days fly by. Coming back from Oklahoma (we do evaluations in Oklahoma City) I thought how much easier it would be to send Erin to school. This is a lot of work!! But it didn't take long to get that thought erased knowing I am right where I should be. The thing is, that isn't the end of the story because it just keeps getting better!!! I cannot wait to see where she will be in two years!! I believe now God first had to wait for mom to get her head on straight. (Too bad it took me 18 years) Second, if we would have a instant healing (which I would take in a heartbeat) then she wouldn't be a witness to all the people that know her. Third, we have all the school documents to show where they diagnosed her and for 14 years had her in the system and got to 3rd grade in math. Fourth, we will be in a GREAT position to tell "in the great meeting" about His miracles. They WILL be too many to count. Pray for us for a ministry of HOPE!!

Subject: Testing

6/3/99

Erin had to do testing about two weeks ago and Mr.  Goos said she did better than he expected. At 19 years old, they don't expect any change in these kids. Not that we have reached the goal, but we are definately pressing on and giving God all the glory and thanks for this progress.

To the teachers (This may may sense--to me it doesn't. However, I do know it is good the scale) Mr Goos used the Wais-R test. Normal range is from 85-115. But it doesn't matter where you are at as long at you know where you are going.

Verbal ability was 56 now 69

Performance ability was 56 now 72

Overall Ability was 52 now 69

Woodcock-Johnson Achievement Test

Letter-word Identification ws 73 now 78

Passage Comprehension was 63 now 74

Calculation (math) was 62 now same

Applied Problems was 68 now 69

Dictation and Wriiting Samples was 68 now 72

The math calculations were at the end of the testing. She started testing at 1:30 and didn't come out of the school until 3:45. It is interesting, one question was "Do you ever work at something for 2 hours or more and keep on task" It was answered no! That just tickled me.